H8ing on ‘H8R’

Charlotte Kyle
Features Editor

When you sign up for a reality show you are automatically signing yourself up for a life of ridicule and judgment.

I’m pretty sure they put that in the contract you sign, right between how much money you’ll get and what you’re not allowed to say when “US Weekly”?or “Entertainment Tonight” interviews you.

So, it seems rather counterintuitive to whine when people ridicule and judge you.

That, however, is the premise of The CW’s “H8R.”

First of all, the show should be mercilessly mocked for the awful title alone. Are we not done with the text-speak yet? It was pretty lame back when Avril Lavigne did it so it’s just ridiculous now.

The way they get the “haters” to say bad things about the “celebrity” is questionable.

(Yes, quotations are necessary for the famous people, as the first episode featured some dude from “The Bachelor” and Snooki from “Jersey Shore.”)

The “haters” are interviewed under the guise of an audition for a pop culture talk show. This means they are trying their hardest to emulate the snarky attitude they see on E! Network. Do I think these people actually devote their time to thinking about how much they hate anyone, let alone a D-list star? Not at all.

The haters’ “confessions” are shot like an episode of “The Maury Povich Show.” You know the super-scripted confession from the guy who insists to the camera that he is NOT the father? It’s like that but even more obnoxious.

The celebrities, of course, act shocked when they see the taped and horribly edited rant against them. Host Mario Lopez just laughs as they watch the video on his iPad. He was probably playing games of Words With Friends between takes.

Then comes the confrontation where the celebrity says the always fun and cliche, “I heard what you said about me” and “You don’t even know me.”

It’s like a teen movie set in high school but the acting is even worse.

The celebrity then tries to convince the hater that they shouldn’t hate them so they cook them dinner or take them in a plane or tell them things they’ve “never told anyone.”

Honestly, though? If you’re hung up on one person disliking you then how have you survived life? I thought disliking some people and being disliked by others is a normal part of the universe. Even the dogs don’t like the cats and the cats don’t like anyone.

One of the worst parts of the show and its concept is that Lopez says it promotes anti-bullying. I’m as down with the anti-bullying campaigns as the next person but I fail to see this connection.

In fact, if the show really is as much about anti-bullying as he claimed, shouldn’t someone have said something when “gay” was used as an insult? Bachelor Dude said people call him gay, then his hater then calls him gay as an insult.

Have we not surpassed this? Have Wanda Sykes and Hilary Duff taught us nothing?

No, Lopez,?you don’t get to say the show is anti-bullying. You take your horrible concept and your forced introductions elsewhere and just call me a hater.

Contact Kyle